May Misery.

Radio 4 calmly reassured us with the forecast "sunny in most places, showers in the west". Of course those of us who survive in the North Argyll Glens know better than to trust those broadcasting from London; and so we had been studying entrails, runes and seaweed for days; however even we were not prepared for the mighty tree snapping Atlantic gale that swept in from the west, always a bit of a pain in May when the trees are more or less in full leaf and there is plenty of windage in them. There's been many an anxious patrol of the immediate policies checking for damage to buildings and roofs to say nothing of the gossamer Great Polytunnels of Trollaigh. Rivers rise and flood the road, trees crash and block many major through routes, ferries stay in port and inevitably our fragile electronic infrastructure starts to buckle. Power lines crackle and pop and Internet connections go bananas to say nothing of our antique BT landlines which only require a force 3 breeze to become inaudible. One fears for those at sea and indeed those with their heavily mortgaged yachts now straining at mooring lines which were meant to be replaced last season, and ground tackle long overdue for a diver's inspection. Not a problem for yours truly as the Trollaigh navy was sold off at Easter under our spending reduction programme; however yacht brokers beware as the Baron now has a pocket full of lose change to splurge on your most excellent wares by way of a replacement.

Of course our current gales are only one element of a miserable May's worth of chilly, wet weather and as one sits indoors avoiding another downpour on the last day of the month it is safe to say that dry days in May can be counted on a few fingers of one hand and I missed them whilst touring south west Cork in the rain! Dearest Dottie and I chose May to tick one challenge off our "bucket list" and organised ourselves to walk through the Lairig Ghru in the Cairngorm mountains. For those of you who have never heard of this spot of spectacular mountain wilderness the "Ghru" is a taxing 20 mile walk through the mountains roughly between Aviemore and Braemar; and despite the risk of upsetting the "wild land" police we walked the route in some style with friends, their children and their dogs; chasing wild Deer, Goats and even putting a Ptarmigan or two up from its nest; although in fairness we were forced from time to time to shelter from snow, hail and gales of wind, to say nothing of wading highland burns in full spate. Encouraged by our company we managed the 20 miles in 11 hours after a 7.00am start which was perhaps unwise after the traditional excellent meal and refreshment at The Old Bridge Inn, Aviemore the night before. Alas Braemar failed to meet the challenge on the hospitality stakes, despite a substantial gin stiffener on arrival; as all we wanted was a clean bed and a hot bath; the former was provided at The Fife Arms however the latter as substituted with a lukewarm shower, not appreciated by dearest Dottie. Fortunately The Gathering Place Bistro fed us and offered shelter from the 100's of pensioners dressed in grey poly cotton and shod in white tennis shoes who now fill the Braemar streets; but we did add a bit of fun by smuggling wet dogs into the pet free Fife Arms accommodation in empty suitcases, porters fortified by a sporting Chilean Carmanere.

We really enjoyed ourselves and now look to other low walks for the autumn or next spring; are there any volunteers for the Corrieyairack? Some loon has already texted suggesting the 4 day Compestello thingy in northern Spain however I feel that may be a bit arduous for the dogs, although dearest Dottie would have no problems! The long range forecast now shows frost for next Friday night, what have we done to deserve this? Yours aye, Archie, The Baron Trollaigh.